Name of Person Reporting Incident:
Alice
Location of Incident:
Yerba Buena Gardens, San Francisco
Time/ Date of Incident:
early evening in Fall 2015
Circumstances of Incident:
- Discrimination based on: gender
- Event by type: harassment in a public place
Description of the Incident:
I worked daily at the park. I was very familiar with the area, knew where security cameras were located, knew to keep a distance from anyone with signs of erratic behavior –not an uncommon sight. That evening I had stayed late at the office, something I had done many times before without incident. It was beginning to get dark out, I said goodnight to the security staff and I headed out across the park to catch a bus home. As I went along the walkway a group of 3 young men were also on the walkway, talking and going in the opposite direction of me. As we passed each other one of the men suddenly lunged at me as if to grab me but stopped his hand just inches from my crotch. I flinched and froze, terrified. He and his friends then continued walking, all of them laughing as if it were a great prank. I don’t remember if I reported the incident to security. Because I wasn’t touched or verbally threatened, I may not have reported it and simply continued home.
What have you thought about since the incident took place?
Why was I targeted? Was it a game these men regularly played on strangers – menacing people in this same manner?
How were you affected by what happened and how?
I certainly became more afraid of walking alone in public spaces, especially in the evening. For at least a year I questioned my ability to judge safety, my ability to defend myself, and how weak I appeared to others. I wished that I had been able to yell or slap away that man’s hand. I now make sure to always text or call a buddy when I am walking at night even if it’s just a couple blocks.
Who else was affected by what happened and how?
I don’t know.
What do you think needs to be done to make things as right as possible?
I wish those men would develop empathy and remorse. What they saw as a harmless prank was a practice in exerting menacing power. Everyone should be able to walk in public without fear of unprovoked physical attack.
What do you need for your healing?
I discussed this incident with a therapist; I know it was not my fault and my instinctive reaction to freeze is not a failing. What I needed was confirmation that my feelings were valid and empowerment. I hope that culture changes so that bully behavior isn’t simply laughed off.
